OKAY, I ADMIT IT. I’m like a dog that won’t let go of a bone.

Lately I’ve been going on about the advantages of writing from a more personal perspective.

It all began a couple weeks back, when I wrote a post extolling the benefits of bios and online profiles written in first person, as compared to the third-person voice which is, unfortunately, more common (Getting To Know You, posted July 10). And here I am still chewing on it. I thought perhaps a demonstration might be helpful.

So below I’ve performed a sample facelift, taking as my lab subject the online profile of BitRebels.com creator Richard Darell. It was a quick, out-patient procedure though; my only revisions were changing third-person references, including the use of Mr. Darell’s full name, to the more simple and personal “I”, “me”, and “my”. He’s now on with his day and probably won’t even have a clear recollection of the operation.

Note that mine’s not the usual Before&After, but an After&Before. Read first the new, first-person version to see if you don’t sense a more natural, less stilted-sounding presentation of Mr. Darell’s credentials when compared to the original.

(My edited, first-person version of his profile)

I am founder and CEO of Bit Rebels, a multifaceted online news outlet that reports daily on the latest developments in technology, social media, design and everything geek. Today this media entity welcomes more than 2.5 million unique visitors per month and is considered the go to place for people in constant motion. As an Internet entrepreneur, I’m dedicated to constantly trying to develop new ways to bring content faster and closer to the end user in a more streamlined way. My excitement for statistics has allowed me to further develop systems that continuously produce accurate and fast-paced analytics to better optimize the approach by which Bit Rebels presents news and content. My graphic design background has proven to be an important tool when designing new systems and features for Bit Rebels since the development of solid and stable code depends entirely on their structure and implemented procedures. I currently reside in Stockholm, Sweden and direct the Bit Rebels offices in both Stockholm and Atlanta. You can reach me at richard@bitrebels.com

(The original, third-person version)

Richard Darell is the founder and CEO of Bit Rebels, a multifaceted online news outlet that reports daily on the latest developments in technology, social media, design and everything geek. Today this media entity welcomes more than 2.5 million unique visitors per month and is considered the go to place for people in constant motion. As an Internet entrepreneur, he is dedicated to constantly trying to develop new ways to bring content faster and closer to the end user in a more streamlined way. His excitement for statistics has allowed him to further develop systems that continuously produce accurate and fast-paced analytics to better optimize the approach by which Bit Rebels presents news and content. His graphic design background has proven to be an important tool when designing new systems and features for Bit Rebels since the development of solid and stable code depends entirely on their structure and implemented procedures. Richard currently resides in Stockholm, Sweden and directs the Bit Rebels offices in both Stockholm and Atlanta. You can reach Richard at richard@bitrebels.com

Perhaps because we’ve been exposed to so many About-The-Author, book-jacket bios and introductions by Charlie Rose, the third-person description sounds acceptable to us. And maybe for some individuals such familiarity, combined with a hesitation to talk about themselves, makes this more detached, seemingly-objective, third-person voice a more comfortable one to adopt in their own profiles.

But consider the internal ear of the reader, and how dissonant that third-person voice might seem to them. I say dissonant because nowadays our personal profiles, as opposed to our book-jacket bios and guest appearances on Charlie Rose, are most often attached to content the whole world knows we’ve written ourselves, whether it’s a resume or a LinkedIn summary. And so, if your profile pretends to be written by a third party, which is the implication, don’t you think your reader might possibly sense something a little duplicitous or even dishonest?

I do.